Worst lyrics Ever

[UniversalRadio]

Not a song you can get on cd (and there's a reason for that), but in my video production class 15 years ago my teacher used us students to make a "music video" for his song "Turn On Your Lava Lamp of Love" It was hard for us students to keep a straight face. I just remember he kept repeating the title. It was the worst hippy crap I ever heard in my life. But the topic of much hilarity among the students.

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[hutter]

I Need A Chick - Devo

I NEED A CHICK
I NEED A CHICK
I NEED A CHICK
I NEED A CHICK
I NEED A CHICK...TO SUCK MY DICK
I NEED A DOG TO LICK MY HOG
I NEED A CAT TO STROKE MY BAT
WELL I NEED A CHICK TO SUCK MY DICK
I'M PUKIN AND SHITIN' AND DYIN' OF THIRST
I AIN'T GOT NO FIELD TO PLOW
THERE'S NO HOLE FOR MY POLE
I'D FUCK A MINK STOLE
I NEED A WOMAN WHO UNDERSTANDS
THERE'S NOTHING MORE SPIRITUAL
THAN DOG STYLE LOVE
AND WHEN I FIND HER
I'M GOING TO GET DOWN ON MY KNEES
I'M GOING TO EAT HER
'CAUSE SHE'S THE MOON


...now that's a love song for ya.[:D]

[UniversalRadio]

That reminds me of that song that dork tried to pitch to Johnny Rotten in "Sid and Nancy"

I need a job
I need a job
I need a real job
One that will fufill
all my artitstic needs
I need a job
I need a job
I need a real job

God that scene was so hilarious!

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[plagiarism]

[quote][i]Originally posted by hutter[/i]
<br>I Need A Chick - Devo
[/quote]

That should definitely go on the Devo 2.1 album.

[hutter]

Eh...they'd just clean it up.

I Need A Chicken Nugget - Devo 2.0

I NEED A CHICKEN NUGGET
I NEED A CHICKEN NUGGET
I NEED A CHICKEN NUGGET
I NEED A CHICKEN NUGGET
I NEED A CHICKEN NUGGET...TO FILL MY STOMACH
I NEED A DOGGY BONE TO HOLD MY PHONE
I NEED A KITTY CAT TO TAKE A NAP
WELL I NEED A CHICKEN NUGGET TO FILL MY STOMACH
I'M DANCING AND JUMPING AND FEEDING MY THIRST
I AIN'T GOT NO HOMEWORK TO DO
THERE'S NO BOOK FOR MY NOOK
I'D NEVER WEAR A MINK STOLE
BE NICE TO ANIMALS, YOU UNDERSTAND
THERE'S NOTHING MORE SPIRITUAL
THAN DOG'S AND CATS GETTING ALONG
AND WHEN I FIND THAT
I'M GOING TO GET DOWN ON MY KNEES
I'M GOING TO PET THEM
'CAUSE PETS ARE COOL


...bleech...[xx(]

[plagiarism]

LOL. I like (in a bad way). But I'm counting on the Devo 2.0 kids getting a couple of years older, being dropped by Disney as a result. Then the kids will go straight to the gutter. All part of Mothersbaugh's master plan.... (Yeah, I'm kidding myself.)

[Peter Venkman]

"The bushland burns in this southern heat
Like an open fire."--Japan, "Still Life In Mobile Homes"

I like Japan and all--really, I do--but Sylvian crawled up his own ass a long, long time ago.

<font size=1 color=#000099>
[i]"Let's have a war so you can go and die,
Let's have a war, we could all use the money,
Let's have a war, we need the space,
Let's have a war, clean out this place!"[/i]--Fear, "Let's Have A War"
</font>

[Spectre General]

[quote][i]Originally posted by hutter[/i]
<br>This guys lyrics beats everyone else's...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ugDdFjlv ... h=chacaron
[/quote]

Holy christ! I hope for this guy's sake he's retarded, or that it's a joke. Although....he does kinda sound like Biz Markie.

I was about to say for worst lyrics ever just pick a rap song. But honestly my vote has to go to Wesley Willis. If any of you are unfortunate enough to be familiar with Wesley Willis, I'm sorry, I truly am.

Here's the all time classic "Rock and Roll McDonalds"

"McDonalds is the place to rock
It is a restaurant where they buy food to eat
It is a good place to listen to the music
People flock here to get down to the rock music

Rock and Roll McDonalds
Rock and Roll McDonalds
Rock and Roll McDonalds
Rock and Roll McDonalds

McDonalds will make you fat
They serve Big Macs
They serve Quarter-Pounders
They will put pounds on you

Rock and Roll McDonalds
Rock and Roll McDonalds
Rock and Roll McDonalds
Rock and Roll McDonalds

McDonalds hamburgers are the worst
They are worse than Burger King
A Big Mac has 26 grams of fat
A Quarter-Pounder has 28 grams of fat

Rock and Roll McDonalds
Rock and Roll McDonalds
Rock and Roll McDonalds
Rock and Roll McDonalds

Wheaties, breakfast of champions"

Now that may look funny, but I assure you it's not. To make matters worse imagine it being "sung" by a completely tone-deaf guy with nothing but a basic $50 Radio Shack keyboard set to "Demo" for backup music. Yeah. Now what's worse is that this guy has like 80 songs with the exact same pattern of "music." Just for clarification, the intonation on the chorus always goes something like this:

Rock and Roll Mc-[b]DON[/b]-alds
Rock and Roll Mc-[b]DON[/b]-alds
Rock and Roll [b]McDONALDS!!![/b]
Rock and Roll Mc-[b]DON[/b]-alds

Titles to some of this guy's other "hits" (by the way the song title is almost always the chorus.)

"Alanis Morrisette" (MTV actually played a video for this)
"I Whupped Batman's Ass"
"I Deserve a War Hell Ride"
"Hell Grehound Bus Ride"
"I Killed Your Daddy After Midnight"
"I Killed Your Daddy Yesterday"
"My Mother Smokes Crack Rocks" (While she was pregnant, apparently)
"The Vultures Ate My Dead Ass Up"
"You Better Find My Pistol"

Thankfully, Wesley Willis is dead.

[Panorama]

Some people say I'm obnoxious and lazy
That I'm uneducated and my opinion means nothin
But I know I'm a real good dancer
Don't need to look over my shoulder to see what I'm after
~ John Cougar Mellencamp, Crumblin’ Down

---------------------------
"Photography with a Vision"
http://www.cooganphoto.com

[Peter Venkman]

[quote][i]Originally posted by Spectre General[/i]
Thankfully, Wesley Willis is dead.[/quote]

Ram a broomstick up your ass
Jump your ass in the lake
Get the hell away from around here
Leave the premesis before I put you in jail

Kiss my black ass, Specte General
Kiss my black ass, Specte General
Kiss my black ass, Specte General
Kiss my black ass, Specte General

You are a dirty low-down scumbag
You are a jerk to me
You think I'm an asshole
You need to leave me alone with your war hell ride, punk!

Kiss my black ass, Specte General
Kiss my black ass, Specte General
Kiss my black ass, Specte General
Kiss my black ass, Specte General

You are drug seller
You are a crackhead as I speak
You are a miserable creep
Here's what you do for me:
Stick your ghetto dope up your ass!

Kiss my black ass, Specte General
Kiss my black ass, Specte General
Kiss my black ass, Specte General
Kiss my black ass, Specte General

Rock over London! Rock on Chicago!

GE, We Bring Good Things To Life!

(Just for reference, here is Jello Biafra's genuinely touching obituary on Wesley Willis. http://www.alternativetentacles.com/jelloonwesley.htm)


<font size=1 color=#000099>
[i]"Let's have a war so you can go and die,
Let's have a war, we could all use the money,
Let's have a war, we need the space,
Let's have a war, clean out this place!"[/i]--Fear, "Let's Have A War"
</font>

[EverydayItsTomorrow]

"She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy" Kenny Chesney

Plowing these fields in the hot summer sun
Over by the gate lordy here she comes
With a basket full of chicken and a big cold jug of sweet tea
I make a little room and she climbs on up
Open up a throttle and stir a little dust
Just look at her face she ain't a foolin me

She thinks my tractor's sexy
It really turns her on
She's always staring at me
While I'm chuggin along
She likes the way it's pullin' while we're tillin' up the land
She's even kind of crazy 'bout my farmer's tan
She's the only one who really understands what gets me
She thinks my tractor's sexy

We ride back and forth until we run out of light
Take it to the barn put it up for the night
Climb up in the loft sit and talk with the radio on
She said she's got a dream and I asked what it is
She wants a little farm and a yard full of kids
One more teeny weeny ride before take her home

She thinks my tractor's sexy
It really turns her on
She's always staring at me
While I'm chuggin along
She likes the way it's pullin' while we're tillin' up the land
She's even kind of crazy 'bout my farmer's tan
She's the only one who really understands what gets me
She thinks my tractor's sexy

Well she ain't into cars or pick up trucks
But if it runs like a Deere man her eyes light up

[Mechi]

[quote][i]Originally posted by hutter[/i]
<br>[quote][i]Originally posted by Peter Venkman[/i]
<br>I hate the Police and everything they stand for.
[/quote]
So, what DO they stand for? (besides tantric sex)
[/quote]

LOL!!!! Hutter.. you rock.[;)]
But Andy and Stewart don't stand for T-sex... only Sting does. And does he really stand 8 hours of it???? In my imagination I say he does but we all know he doesn't.

Really bad lyrics... My Coco by Stellastarr [sorry but it sucks]
Cool my brains and soothe my head
Stimulate me my Co-co-co
Sneak into my empty bed
And educate me my Co-co-co


<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~myirwin/JD_Montage2.jpg">

[phillyidol]

We Built this city-starship

Please! Must I sing it? (hurling!)

[obs]

Not the worst but ...

Camouflage:
The Great Commandment shows the contempt
Between the world and their embarassing pavement.


WTF is an embarassing pavement??

[EverydayItsTomorrow]

Here's a cute one
Sunscreams' Love U More


My sex hung, torn, and quartered
But you know you can never make me love you more
Let the new day hide, leave the scars inside
Still you know you can never make me love you more

We can make the sun turn purple
We can make the sea turn turtle
But you know you can never make me love you more
We can turn wine into water
As fathers rape their daughters
But you know you can never make me love you more