Making new friends

[dcs84]

This is an intriquing topic. I am 36 and I think that the difficulty in meeting and maintaining new friends has a lot of complexities. Age is a huge one, the older you get the more difficult it is. As Seinfeld said when you are young "Anyone outside your house is your friend, and if they like the same candy as you, then they're your best friend", and from that level of simplicity, as you age, it spirals towards something a little darker and a lot more complex. I used to say (to whomever would listen) that the greatest love of my life was a Ms Finneran in 4th grade, and yet I never touched her or spoke to her, quite simply because she was the prettiest girl in school, I knew nothing of her future attitude, or politics, or racial standpoint or anything that might apall me or change my fondness for her, it was pure, 'she looked purdy, and I had a crush on her'. As we get older everything becomes more complex, people grate on us, their value system is subconciously picked apart and analysed, and if there is anything that makes a friendship with that person seem too difficult then that person is disqualified as a potential friend. And it gets to the point where they are either too opinionated, too conceited, too 'new millenium', too vacuous, too self absorbed, not witty enough, not rich enough, not poor enough, their job is better than mine, their job is not as important as mine...whatever it is, it just tends, from my perspective, sometimes, to just be too difficult, and as someone else said on this site, it is just easier to be selfish and watch TV.

Also I find that when with friends I, and this is probably a personal thing, feel the need to 'perform' and it can get so tiring.

[ben_at_work]

Friends? Friends are for suckers. [:p]

[newwavepunkgirl]

[quote][i]Originally posted by dcs84[/i]
<br>This is an intriquing topic. I am 36 and I think that the difficulty in meeting and maintaining new friends has a lot of complexities. Age is a huge one, the older you get the more difficult it is. As Seinfeld said when you are young "Anyone outside your house is your friend, and if they like the same candy as you, then they're your best friend", and from that level of simplicity, as you age, it spirals towards something a little darker and a lot more complex. I used to say (to whomever would listen) that the greatest love of my life was a Ms Finneran in 4th grade, and yet I never touched her or spoke to her, quite simply because she was the prettiest girl in school, I knew nothing of her future attitude, or politics, or racial standpoint or anything that might apall me or change my fondness for her, it was pure, 'she looked purdy, and I had a crush on her'. As we get older everything becomes more complex, people grate on us, their value system is subconciously picked apart and analysed, and if there is anything that makes a friendship with that person seem too difficult then that person is disqualified as a potential friend. And it gets to the point where they are either too opinionated, too conceited, too 'new millenium', too vacuous, too self absorbed, not witty enough, not rich enough, not poor enough, their job is better than mine, their job is not as important as mine...whatever it is, it just tends, from my perspective, sometimes, to just be too difficult, and as someone else said on this site, it is just easier to be selfish and watch TV.

Also I find that when with friends I, and this is probably a personal thing, feel the need to 'perform' and it can get so tiring.
[/quote]

You shouldn't feel you have to perform with your friends, real friends are like you can totally be yourself, you can make an idiot of yourself, screw up and they still love you and vice-versa, hence you don't get many of them! I know what you mean about being more picky in my case I think it is more wary because I have been hurt alot in the past by some so-called friends!It's kinda when you hit a crisis you knwo who your real friends are don't you?[:(!]

Devolution is real

[newwavepunkgirl]

[quote][i]Originally posted by ben_at_work[/i]
<br>Friends? Friends are for suckers. [:p]
[/quote]

[:D][:D][:D][:D][:D][:D][:D]

Devolution is real

[Bitter Almonds]

[quote][i]Originally posted by newwavepunkgirl[/i]
<br>[quote][i]Originally posted by dcs84[/i]
<br>This is an intriquing topic. I am 36 and I think that the difficulty in meeting and maintaining new friends has a lot of complexities. Age is a huge one, the older you get the more difficult it is. As Seinfeld said when you are young "Anyone outside your house is your friend, and if they like the same candy as you, then they're your best friend", and from that level of simplicity, as you age, it spirals towards something a little darker and a lot more complex. I used to say (to whomever would listen) that the greatest love of my life was a Ms Finneran in 4th grade, and yet I never touched her or spoke to her, quite simply because she was the prettiest girl in school, I knew nothing of her future attitude, or politics, or racial standpoint or anything that might apall me or change my fondness for her, it was pure, 'she looked purdy, and I had a crush on her'. As we get older everything becomes more complex, people grate on us, their value system is subconciously picked apart and analysed, and if there is anything that makes a friendship with that person seem too difficult then that person is disqualified as a potential friend. And it gets to the point where they are either too opinionated, too conceited, too 'new millenium', too vacuous, too self absorbed, not witty enough, not rich enough, not poor enough, their job is better than mine, their job is not as important as mine...whatever it is, it just tends, from my perspective, sometimes, to just be too difficult, and as someone else said on this site, it is just easier to be selfish and watch TV.

Also I find that when with friends I, and this is probably a personal thing, feel the need to 'perform' and it can get so tiring.
[/quote]

You shouldn't feel you have to perform with your friends, real friends are like you can totally be yourself, you can make an idiot of yourself, screw up and they still love you and vice-versa, hence you don't get many of them! I know what you mean about being more picky in my case I think it is more wary because I have been hurt alot in the past by some so-called friends!It's kinda when you hit a crisis you knwo who your real friends are don't you?[:(!]

Devolution is real
[/quote]

<p align="justify">Then you'd have a real hard time making "friends" in Southern California because there is fair weather year round - and the people reflect such weather[}:)]