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For the guys.....

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 4:20 am
by Max Murdoc
Let’s have a moment of silence for a good friend of mine. After 18 years of marriage, my good friends wife finally snipped the last bit of flesh holding his balls on. Sad, sad day. The poor guy has given up. He can’t wipe his ass unless she’s says it’s ok.
He put up a good fight but she wore him down. I never figured he’d give in.
All good things must come to an end.

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 4:59 am
by coop41
What took her so long?

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 5:31 am
by Max Murdoc
[quote][i]Originally posted by coop41[/i]
<br>What took her so long?
[/quote]
Oh, she tried from the start but he held on. I suppose some of the blame is his for letting her dictate his daily routine. It's an end of an era. Out of all of my friends, I'm the only one who doesn't have to answer to anybody (I'm divorced).

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 6:22 am
by birdmadgirl
Dude, not all of us wives are ball-stealing, soul-sucking, shrieking banshees....

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 6:59 am
by enzfan
[quote][i]Originally posted by birdmadgirl[/i]
<br>Dude, not all of us wives are ball-stealing, soul-sucking, shrieking banshees....
[/quote]They're not???

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 7:03 am
by Max Murdoc
[quote][i]Originally posted by birdmadgirl[/i]
<br>Dude, not all of us wives are ball-stealing, soul-sucking, shrieking banshees....
[/quote]
And I didn't say that any of the females here are now did I? SHE IS a ball-stealing, soul-sucking, shrieking banshee and I thank you for that description.
I'm sure the rest of you are fine women who wouldn't fall into the above mentioned description.

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 7:26 am
by birdmadgirl
[quote][i]Originally posted by Max Murdoc[/i]
<br>[quote][i]Originally posted by birdmadgirl[/i]
<br>Dude, not all of us wives are ball-stealing, soul-sucking, shrieking banshees....
[/quote]
And I didn't say that any of the females here are now did I?
[/quote]
Well, no, but you did say that you don't have to answer to anyone because you are divorced. And given the context of your original post, I made the jump from married woman to shrieking banshee. (And believe me, I think for the most part, they DO go hand in hand...)
At any rate, I should have parked a [:)] on there when I posted. And I'm glad your, ahem, balls are safe. [;)]

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 7:26 am
by oneno
I didn't know my ex remarried?
<img src="http://music.hyperreal.org/artists/brian_eno/thennow.gif">
one know

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 7:42 am
by Max Murdoc
[quote][i]Originally posted by birdmadgirl[/i]
<br>[quote][i]Originally posted by Max Murdoc[/i]
<br>[quote][i]Originally posted by birdmadgirl[/i]
<br>Dude, not all of us wives are ball-stealing, soul-sucking, shrieking banshees....
[/quote]
And I didn't say that any of the females here are now did I?
[/quote]
Well, no, but you did say that you don't have to answer to anyone because you are divorced. And given the context of your original post, I made the jump from married woman to shrieking banshee. (And believe me, I think for the most part, they DO go hand in hand...)
At any rate, I should have parked a [:)] on there when I posted. And I'm glad your, ahem, balls are safe. [;)]
[/quote]
I should have also left a [:)]. Too much sarcasim on my part.

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 8:22 am
by MARV
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
<a href="http://www.worldwildlife.org/cetaceans/index.cfm">Own. Rule. All.</a>

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 8:59 am
by marie3
What state are you in Max Murdoc? You seem to have some crazy ladies living there.

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 4:29 pm
by zill
My buddy, a golf enthusiast, just celebrated his 18th year with his wife. All these years he's insisted on one little bit of privacy - he kept a filing cabinet that was "his" personal domain and she was to respect his privacy and not snoop inside it.
One day she couldn't help herself and she opened the cabinet, only to find 3 golfballs and and a few hundred dollars in cash. She admitted her snooping and asked him what the big deal was about 3 golfballs and some money. He admitted that everytime he had cheated on her, he put a golfball in the cabinet to remind him of his unfaithfulness.
At first she was pissed but then she thought, hey, 18 years is a long time and if he only cheated 3 times, it wasn't that bad. Life went on for a couple of days until it dawned on her that she hadn't asked about the few hundred dollars of cash. "Oh, that," he said, "well every time I had a dozen balls I sold them down at the driving range".
He was castrated.

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 9:49 pm
by Max Murdoc
[quote][i]Originally posted by marie3[/i]
<br>What state are you in Max Murdoc? You seem to have some crazy ladies living there.
[/quote]
I'm in a state of mass confusion. The ones that are decent are taken and all the ones left over are well, leftovers. Leftovers are generally good the next day but you shy away from them when they've been there too long.
I have to admit that I do harbor some resentment towards females anymore....the majority I have come across screwed me over one way or another. I'm sure there are some good ones out there but they're hiding from me.

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 9:57 pm
by enzfan
[quote][i]Originally posted by Max Murdoc[/i]
<br>[quote][i]Originally posted by marie3[/i]
<br>What state are you in Max Murdoc? You seem to have some crazy ladies living there.
[/quote]
I'm in a state of mass confusion. The ones that are decent are taken and all the ones left over are well, leftovers. Leftovers are generally good the next day but you shy away from them when they've been there too long.
I have to admit that I do harbor some resentment towards females anymore....the majority I have come across screwed me over one way or another. I'm sure there are some good ones out there but they're hiding from me.[/quote]I'm friends with a female co worker who has been divorced for years and expresses the same sentiments as you towards men. She is a self admitted man hater, she says they are good for one thing and one thing only.

Posted:
Mon Jan 07, 2008 11:25 pm
by Max Murdoc
[quote][i]Originally posted by enzfan[/i]
<br>[quote][i]Originally posted by Max Murdoc[/i]
<br>[quote][i]Originally posted by marie3[/i]
<br>What state are you in Max Murdoc? You seem to have some crazy ladies living there.
[/quote]
I'm in a state of mass confusion. The ones that are decent are taken and all the ones left over are well, leftovers. Leftovers are generally good the next day but you shy away from them when they've been there too long.
I have to admit that I do harbor some resentment towards females anymore....the majority I have come across screwed me over one way or another. I'm sure there are some good ones out there but they're hiding from me.[/quote]I'm friends with a female co worker who has been divorced for years and expresses the same sentiments as you towards men. She is a self admitted man hater, she says they are good for one thing and one thing only.
[/quote]
Well, it's not that I hate 'em....far from it. I loves women folk. I'm not your typical male. I believe in sharing duties, hell I practically raised 2 kids by myself. I don't sit in front of the tube or go out and play golf or drink with my friends. After close to 10 years looking for someone, I just figured hey, I just survived 10 years without someone so I can continue on without.