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New Wave Songs That Would Put You Off New Wave

PostPosted: Tue May 10, 2011 3:15 pm
by zill
If this was all the new wave I'd ever heard, I wouldn't be a member of this board. Scary thing is, I'm sure there are a lot of other awful songs I'm missing.

Culture Club - Karma Chameleon (vomit inducing)
Taco - Cheek To Cheek (did you know there was a single after Puttin on the Ritz?)
Toyah Wilcox - Danced (one of the few Toyah songs I've heard...thankfully)
Kajagoogoo - Ooh To Be Ah (is this even a fucking song?)
Kajagoogoo - Too Shy (too wimpy)
The Colourfield - Castles In The Air (no comment necessary)
Bananarama - Shy Boy (skank backup singers without a lead vocalist)
The Colourfield - Thinking Of You (marginally better than Casltes)
The Smiths - Meat Is Murder (I'm pretty sure Morrissey has savoured the flavor of meat in his mouth)
Marilyn - Calling Your Name (Boy George wannabe)
Cock Robin - When Your Heart Is Weak (induces chest pains)
Ca Va Ca Va - Where's Romeo (perhaps the most annoying voice in new wave)
Dollar - Mirror Mirror (its just so...so...sugary sweet)
Haysi Fantayzee - Shiny Shiny (I don't care what you say, it reminds me of Culture Club)
Spandau Ballet - Gold (its a bongo heavy song)
Parachute Club - Rise Up (the worst of CanCon)
Musical Youth - Pass The Dutchie (reggae mini pops)
Northern Lights - Tears Are Not Enough (Canada's answer to Band Aid)
Mobiles - Build Me Up Buttercup (damn the CD release for including this crap)
Seona Dancing - More To Lose (sappy crap)
Men Without Hats - Pop Goes the World (one silly keyboard riff scores a hit?)
The Bangles - Walk Like An Egyptian (a long way from Going Down To Liverpool)
Wham! - Wake Me Up Before You Go Go (just plain annoying)
Nightmares In Wax - Black Leather (Pete Burns singing about studly gay men on their motor bikes and breaking into KC and the Sunshine Band)
Freur - Doot Doot (clever lyrics...the best of the worst)

PostPosted: Tue May 10, 2011 10:03 pm
by wherewereuin82
Pretty much anything by Alphaville.

PostPosted: Tue May 10, 2011 10:27 pm
by SomebodySomewhere
Morrissey's and Bernard Sumner's "voices" do it for me.

I love how many people on here regularly trash anybody who was popular in the '80s and who could actually carry a tune but hold those 2 tone-deaf non-talents in high regard. I don't even think ProTools could fix their vocals.

Morrissey's abysmal lyrics and complete lack of understanding of songwriting, meter, chords and structure give him the slight edge. He really is one of the worst "song" writers in the world to ever get universal critical acclaim while having literally zero talent.

PostPosted: Tue May 10, 2011 11:44 pm
by Frau_Blucher
Yeah, who'd want any of that naive DIY element to creep into alternative music.


Oh, and Video Killed the Radio Star!

PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 1:15 am
by plagiarism
[quote][i]Originally posted by SomebodySomewhere[/i]
<br>Morrissey's and Bernard Sumner's "voices" do it for me.
[/quote]

Testify. Great music, but very dodgy singing.

I shouldn't be able to stand Fred Schneider's "singing" either, but he's so campy and Kate counterbalances it, I guess. That said, I'll start my list with...

B-52s - Love Shack
Dexy's Midnight Runners - Come On Eileen
Stephen "Tin Tin" Duffy - Kiss Me

And pretty much everything by Culture Club and Scritti Politti

PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 1:26 am
by the_moth
anything by Haircut 100, The Specials, The Jam and so on...

PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 1:59 am
by Qbertqubes
You're kidding?

[quote][i]Originally posted by wherewereuin82[/i]
<br>Pretty much anything by Alphaville.
[/quote]

PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 2:16 am
by zill
[:0] I forgot Violins! [:0]

PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 4:59 am
by eight6
[quote][i]Originally posted by zill[/i]
<br>[:0] I forgot Violins! [:0]
[/quote]

Expect an e-mail from Grayson Crosby...

PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 7:08 am
by djcraig
Haysi Fantayzee - Shiny Shiny. Agreed. Just Nauseating Noise.

Add to the list:

I Eat Cannibals- Total Coelo
Chicken Outlaw- Wide Boy Awake
Thompson Twins- King For A Day
Anything by Sig Sig Sputnik

Makes one wonder how such terrible songs even saw the light of day. With my beloved KROQ being fueled by cocaine and payola (allegedly), some bad decisions were made.

<a href="http://www.djcraig.net/los_angeles_dj">DJ Craig</a>

PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 7:22 am
by zill
[quote][i]Originally posted by djcraig[/i]
<br>Haysi Fantayzee - Shiny Shiny. Agreed. Just Nauseating Noise.

Add to the list:

I Eat Cannibals- Total Coelo
Chicken Outlaw- Wide Boy Awake
Thompson Twins- King For A Day
Anything by Sig Sig Sputnik

Makes one wonder how such terrible songs even saw the light of day. With my beloved KROQ being fueled by cocaine and payola (allegedly), some bad decisions were made.

<a href="http://www.djcraig.net/los_angeles_dj">DJ Craig</a>


[/quote]

That's funny, I had I Eat Cannibals (and Dracula's Tango) , King For A Day and Atari Baby on my original list!

PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 7:28 am
by Doctor Doctor
love will bloody tear us apart

[b]"And now I know how Joan of Arc felt, as the flames rose to her roman nose and her Walkman started to melt"[/b]

PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 7:46 am
by wherewereuin82
[quote][i]Originally posted by Qbertqubes[/i]
<br>You're kidding?

[quote][i]Originally posted by wherewereuin82[/i]
<br>Pretty much anything by Alphaville.
[/quote]
[/quote]


I'd rather jab my ears with ice picks.

PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2011 4:59 pm
by Frank_Chickens
New Order - Blue Monday (overkill factor)
Soft Cell - Tainted Love (")
Thompson Twins - Doctor Doctor (surely he was taking the piss with this?)
Seona Dancing - Bitter Heart (terrible Numan-esque vocals with a tune that uses the default settings on the keyboard)
Bananarama - Na Na Na Na (meaningless rubbish)
DMR - Come On Eileen (BIG hit here, sigh)
Hayzee Fantayzee - anything by them (aural wankery at its, uh, finest)
Culture Club - Karma Chameleon (sickening)
Joy Division - Love Will Tear Us Apart (see New Order)
Sigue Sigue Sputnik - Anything (did you ever get round to writing a second fucking tune?)
Spandau Ballet - Musclebound (overwrought sludgy nonsense)
Arrow - Hot Hot Hot - (annoying piece of shit)
Musical Youth - Pass The Dutchie (I'm from Birmingham and can only apologise, sorry)
Bucks Fizz - Making Your Mind Up (when you come to fame through ripping the skirts off your female co-singers in a naff song contest rather than your music it says a lot, most of it negative)

Siouxie and the Banshees - Hong Kong Garden (overblown nonsense with a pretentious intro)

I didn't include 'Doot Doot' as over here it barely scraped the charts so don't mind it too much.

PostPosted: Thu May 12, 2011 1:37 am
by zill
I only kept this one off my list because I've already been chastised here for not appreciating the clever lyrics. Good call, Frank.

Siouxie and the Banshees - Hong Kong Garden