by phillyidol » Wed Nov 21, 2007 8:32 pm
Thanks dude! I will start out by giving my best holiday memory/fight.
It is very rare that I see any of my wifes family. We don't go over there and they don't come over here. The last time I saw most of them was at a wedding where my brother in law challenged me to a fight. (that is another story for another time)
So it is back when we used to visit, about 11 or 12 years ago. My wife has 3 sisters. We all meet up at the moms in The Bronx. Picture one room with 2 bedrooms and a kitchen and bathroom. It is tiny. But every square inch of space has something in it. The couch is covered in plastic and so are the floors. Thats right, she took the extra sheets from the guy that covered the couch 25 years ago and layed them on the floor.It must have been 100 degrees all year long there. You couldn't breathe. The only thing to do was watch tv if you could hear it over the dog barking, the radiator hissing, and the women cackling. With me so far? Oh and the tv was a regular tv sitting on top of another tv...a giant console tv that she won't get rid of but does not work.
OK.....now on top of this great scene that I described, throw in my brother in law. Picture John Leguizamo only with no job. So he shows up. 2 cell phones on his belt, a laptop in one hand and a briefcase in the other. He comes in mumbling to himself and then sets up all his gear on the table we are supposed to eat on. BTW, my first question to my wife was "I thought he didn't have a job". He doesn't. He begins to talk on both phones, russel through papers (probably blank) and work on his laptop. Don't forget he has no job, the papers are blank and the phones were probably off so he is talking to himself. All of a sudden....he has an emergency and has to go! Bam out the door! Nobody says anything. Picture me looking around the room with confusion on my face. Did anyone see that or am I dreaming? Nobody says a thing. Fast forward about 6 hours. Dinner is finished. I already ate my poison dinner (true but a story for later). Knock knock....who do you think is at the door at 9 oclock at night after vanishing? Yup, its him and he is wasted drunk! And he has chinese food?!!!!!! I said I'm sorry, I thought today was thanksgiving.He takes of his coat, gets stuck in the coat and crashes through the table. Then he starts cring about his chinese food. I stood up, and said thats it check please! Told my wife to get her coat and walked out. Then drove home to Brooklyn with a pain in my gut like someone put broken glass in my food.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!!!!!!
Phillyidol
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